Anon Prompt: Virgin!Adam and surprised Kurt
A/N: Can I just say how much I ADORE this prompt? Hope you enjoy!
Kurt sighed into his pillow.
It had been months since he and Adam got together, yet there had been nothing more than the basic hugs, kisses and cuddling when they slept together on the same bed. And by slept together, they literally just closed their eyes and cuddled each other until they fell into deep slumber. Fully clothed.
And the next morning, Adam would flash one of his smiles, kiss Kurt on the nose or his temple and then hop off the bed to prepare his famous authentic British cuppa tea, leaving Kurt wondering what he was doing wrong. He really didn’t want to go back to thinking about his days as the “baby penguin.” Sure, he wasn’t the best looking or the most sexually attractive of them all, but why wasn’t Adam being more like a …typical, well, man?
All in all, it was a giant blow to his ego, and Kurt being Kurt took it very, very personally. Was he simply not sexy enough? Did Adam not love him as much as he verbally expressed? Adam couldn’t be one of…those, could he? No, no, he would not let his thoughts stray that far.
Kurt sighed again, rolling over onto his back and staring at the ceiling above him. He had dropped not-so subtle hints here and there, even purposefully walking out of showers with only a towel around his waist, yet Adam seemed to always just brush him off, come up with some other excuse or change the subject. And he was damn good at it too.
“What’s wrong, love?” Adam asked, handing his lover a cup. “You don’t look too happy and you know what that does to me.”
“It’s nothing. I guess I’m still trying to wake up,” Kurt replied, forcing a smile. There was no way in hell that he was going to confront Adam about it.
“Well, if you’re telling me the truth, which I doubt, but I’ll pretend to be fooled, you should get more sleep,” Adam replied playfully, leaning forward to plant a chaste kiss. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
“Of course,” Kurt lied and closed his eyes again as he listened to his boyfriend leave the room.
Kurt was horrified.
All he had wanted to do was check some things on Adam’s computer. He honestly didn’t expect to find…pornography on it. And as an avid hater of the industry, Kurt was so angry, disgusted and confused at the same time, he was having a difficult time containing it all within himself. Why in hell was his sweet, loving boyfriend looking up gay porn sites on the web? Is this what he had been up to instead of taking their relationship to the next step? Was Kurt so physically unappealing compared to these…”actors” that Adam had resorted to self-gratification?
Kurt covered his mouth with his hand, trying to get a handle on the situation. And he realized, this had to be fixed once and for all. If Adam didn’t want him, then he had to know the truth. Even if it was going to kill him to listen to it.
“Adam! ADAM!” Kurt screamed, startling his boyfriend who had been lounging on the couch watching some mindless daytime TV.
“What’s wrong, darling?”
“What’s wrong? You’re seriously asking me what’s wrong?” Kurt asked incredulously, his eyes burning with anger and hurt. “If you don’t want me, just say it.”
“What?” Adam looked so genuinely flabbergasted that Kurt took a step back, exhaled slowly and tried to gain some semblance of composure.
“Look, we’ve been together for months, we practically live together, we sleep on the same bed, we do so many things together, yet you don’t want to do anything more than hold hands or kiss. So tell me, is something wrong with me?”
“Goodness, Kurt, of course not, why would you say such a thing?” Adam questioned, pushing himself off the couch and approaching his now very angry boyfriend.
“Then what is it? I think we’re mature enough to talk about this like two grown-up men.”
“Kurt, it’s not you, it’s-“
“Don’t. Don’t you dare,” Kurt hissed vehemently, holding a hand up to silence Adam.
“Kurt, but it really isn’t you,” the blonde tried again, his voice almost pleading.
“Then explain to me why you can watch all these porn on your computer, yet you won’t lay a finger on me! Oh my god, you know what? Nevermind, this is stupid. I’m just gonna go,” Kurt muttered, his eyes burning with unshed tears. Yet Adam’s strong hand pulled him by the wrist, and in a blink he found himself locked in a tight embrace.
“Kurt, I swear, there is nothing wrong with you. You’re perfect and I mean it.”
“Then what is it…” Kurt’s voice was muffled by the soft fabric of Adam’s shirt. Even with the anger and the frustration lingering in his system, feeling Adam against him and taking in the familiar scent made him so damn happy and safe, it was ridiculous.
“Kurt, you know I love you. You have no idea just how much. And trust me, there is nothing in this world I wouldn’t want to do with you.”
Kurt blinked and looked up slowly, his eyes meeting the gentle depths that were Adam’s.
“Then why won’t you…”
“I was really, sincerely hoping that it wouldn’t come to this before I…well, before I…oh bloody hell, this is such a mess,” Adam breathed, pursing his lips. He sighed and gently cupped his boyfriend’s cheeks. “Kurt, I want our first time to be perfect, because I love you too much for it to not be. And I know we’ve never talked about this explicitly and I know that I may not seem the part, but love, I just…I have absolutely no experience and couldn’t bring myself to risk ruining it.”
“I don’t understand…”
“Kurt, you’d be my first.”
“….oh…oh. Oh!” Kurt instinctively held a hand against his mouth, his eyes wide in surprise.
“I really hope this doesn’t change the way you see me.”
“No, of course not. I…I’m just surprised. I never…wow. So that porn on your laptop was…?”
“Study material, although now I know that they’re nowhere near educational. I’m sorry for hurting you Kurt. I just wanted it to be….mind-blowing for you, so to speak.”
“I don’t know whether to laugh or cry or hug you or…”
“Laugh first, don’t cry and then give me a hug?”
Kurt giggled at Adam’s sheepish grin and launched himself at his boyfriend. And to think that he’d been so worried that Adam didn’t want him…what the hell had he been on?
“So we’re OK?” Adam asked carefully, his arms securely wrapped around Kurt’s waist.
“Just one more thing.”
Kurt smiled softly at the nervous expression of the man before him. The man who had become his everything and more. The man who he loved with every fiber of his being. And as he stared into those eyes, Kurt couldn’t help but think…
“Adam Crawford, there is no way that it’d be anything less than perfect for me, as long as it was with you.”